I was in the middle of Year 10 when the COVID-19 pandemic suddenly hit. I remember my first reaction of astonishment as the situation was new to me, but at the same time, I felt relieved as I thought this could be like an extended school holiday for me.
But little did I realise at the time, the difficulties and sacrifices I had to face, which could have a long-lasting impact on me and my family.
At the beginning of the pandemic, my learning completely stopped. I missed out on learning a lot of my GCSE content, and it was impossible to catch up to later on. There was constant confusion as lots of changes were made as to what we thought might be in the final GCSE exams, and then they didn’t even happen in the end!
As a perfectionist and someone who carries myself with high expectations, I was quite anxious and sensitive about the changes, which took a toll on my mental health as the pandemic continued. I remember feeling constantly worried, anxious, and doubtful about whether I could achieve the grades that I strive for, as there was very little reassurance given to us at the time.
As the lockdown extended, online learning was introduced. However, it was difficult for me to concentrate and learn most of the time due to technical difficulties and my lack of familiarity with online lessons. There were also times when online classes were cancelled due to technical difficulties faced by teachers, which made me more worried as I had to complete my schoolwork on my own without their guidance.
At home, I lived with my younger sibling and grandmother, who developed serious health conditions during the pandemic, which restricted her mobility. I remember there was a constant fear within me of catching COVID-19 by accident and spreading it within my home, particularly to my grandmother. I therefore avoided physical social contact as much as possible to remain safe which led to a period of social isolation for me. Most of my time during the pandemic was spent taking care of my younger sibling and grandmother at home.
Looking back on it now, I realise there were times I struggled to balance my studies while looking after my younger sibling and grandmother at home. The constant fear, social isolation, feeling the need to stay alert at any time in case anything happens to my grandmother, persistent worries about my studies, and uncertainty about my future were some of the mixed emotions I had to cope with during the COVID-19 pandemic and the restrictions.
There was a lot of confusion about everything including my plans and studies after the lockdown restrictions lifted. I went through different future options for my higher education. I did struggle mentally with deciding what I wanted to do after the pandemic as it felt like there was a sudden change in the perception of time. However, I’m in a place now where I’m satisfied with myself and the options I have chosen despite the disruption to my learning. I am currently in university with my chosen career path after going through all the options during A-levels.
By writing my experiences down, I realised how important it is for us as individuals to reflect and look back on the time spent during the COVID-19 pandemic and I encourage other people to do the same.